There is so much to know about this wondrous activity called blogging.
I remember the first time I heard about this thing called a blog. Hmmm, a web-log, eh?
Kind of like a diary? Yes.
Kind of like a journal? Yes.
Kind of like a documentary? Ok, that too.
“It’s so easy”, I was told. Just go to (wordpress, blogger, blogspot, livejournal, typepad, etc.).com and start writing. Everyone is doing it! It sounded easy. I began to look for other blogs, and see what other people were doing, and I kind of relished the thought of putting my experiences out there for people to read about me, and what I was doing. Not only that, but it seemed like a great way of getting my name out in the community.
I guess I didn’t realize that it could also become my 2nd full time job, if I allowed it to. I must admit, that the more I learn about blogging, and WordPress, and all the other “stuff”, the more inadequate I feel, and sometimes, I am just blank. Some days, I think of hundreds of ideas to write about, and the next day, I am so overwhelmed, I can’t even bring myself to log on. I’m really busy writing meaningful weddings, Bar Mitzvah ceremonies, and representing the Jewish faith, that I forget to write for days at a time.
Then, a blog reviewer comes along, sends me an email, and says…”Your blog would be excellent – if you could only be sure to blog every day.” WHAT? Every day? Seriously, I’m trying. I really am. But I have realized that my blog productivity is absolutely tied to my mindset on any given day, and there really is so much psychology around the written word.
There are days when I am incubating some really ground-breaking ideas, as I have been since returning from NY. And guess what has happened to my blog? I realize it has been almost 11 days since I returned, and I haven’t published a single entry. I also realize that I have withdrawn a bit from my social life, my family, and even my friends. So, my blog is also a victim of my mental state on any given day. I suppose that’s one of the maladies of being self-accountable – nobody to force me to produce, which some days, I admit, I really need.
Anyway – I’m wondering if I’m the only one who feels that their blog productivity is tied to the way they are feeling, or what is going on in their lives? Does it just come naturally to want to put something out there every day? Who knows if what I write is interesting? Who cares?
I have 14 drafts sitting in my to-do list, and yet, here I sit writing about not writing. It all gets so overwhelming, sometimes, and no matter what anyone says, it is NOT easy. Once I write, how do I get people to read? Am I writing about the right stuff? Does it matter? There are 207.601 bloggers on WordPress.com. What will make someone read mine? Some days, just seeing that number makes me feel insignificant, and when I feel insignificant, I tend to avoid that which makes me feel more-so. There are so many feelings tied to writing. So many issues to consider, and so many connections to how I feel, on the inside.
Today, I feel bold. Today, I feel happy to be alive, more so because 49 people lost their lives on a flight from Newark to Buffalo, and I remember that I must live every moment to its fullest. I remember that I shouldn’t ever let a moment go to tell someone I love them, and just maybe, I shouldn’t miss a moment to blog. I remember to move from guilty to forgiven, because I have the power to forgive myself, and move on.
So much psychology around blogging…
B’Shalom,
