When I think about my most unique weddings, I immediately think about the unique relationships I have formed, not only with my couples, but with their friends and family as well, because to ME – that is what makes MY weddings most unique!  For instance, when I’m asked that question, I am always taken back to Dan & Rita’s in Mexico, Felix & Evelina’s in Aruba, Jenni & Mike’s in Fort Lauderdale (diverted from Mexico compliments of Swine Flu), and now, Cheryl and Prav.  Unique to me, are couples and family who are now as close to me as my own family, and whose experiences made a lasting impression on me – for years to come.

And now, I can add Cheryl and Prav to that list.  From the moment I spoke to  Cheryl, we were in love!  She and Prav live in Raleigh, NC, but her mom lives in Boca, and so we made plans to meet on her next trip to South Florida.  Cheryl, Prav, her mom Joselyn, and Step-Dad Ted all met at Cheesecake Factory for dinner, and had the best time.  It was important to Cheryl that I knew her and Prav – I mean – really knew her, and Cheryl LOVES to share, so getting to know them as individuals and as a couple was very easy.  Cheryl and Prav have hearts the size of Manhattan.  They would do anything, give anything, be anything, to and for anyone they loved, because that is just who they are.

And boy oh boy – do they love each other.  Yeah, I know – every couple on their wedding day really loves each other, but seriously, this couple is different.  The love they share for one another brings each of them to tears – at least 3 times a day.  I seriously think Prav prays three times a day, and each time, his #1 prayer is one of gratitude for Cheryl – and vice versa.  I’ve never seen a couple so incredibly grateful for each other, and that’s part of what make Cheryl and Prav so unique.

So, on December 21, at Coconut Cove in Islamorada, with the most beautiful ocean behind me, and the most beautiful couple in front of me, I joined Cheryl and Prav in marriage, in a night I will likely never forget.  The venue, I just have to say, was one of the best places I have ever performed a wedding at.  First and foremost, it is a beautiful piece of real estate, but Paul and Magda run the operation, and they run it like it was their own wedding.

The food is amazing, but it was also the layout I loved most.  Guests could dance, but the dining area was separated from the dance floor, so we could enjoy each other’s company, if we chose not to dance.  And the fact that it was a private location – without 10 other weddings going on at the same time made it feel so personal, and warm, that it was incredibly enjoyable!  BUT – the most amazing part?  How about taking your first dance on the packed-sand beach, with fireworks being set off behind you?  Priceless, incredibly priceless.

The most priceless part, overall, however, is my Cheryl and Prav.  I love how they love each other.  They inspire me.  They encourage me.  They have become incredibly meaningful in my life, and I can’t imagine life without them.  Now, that’s unique.

Love you, Cheryl & Prav!

Pam and Jason - Atlantic Dunes Park

What made this ceremony unique was that Jason has 3 children, and it was important for them in incorporate the children into the ceremony.  Not just to give them a part, but to make them feel like they were part of this marriage, and profound change in their family structure.

Pam, Jason, and Children - family unity!

We created a beautiful, non religious, spiritual ceremony that paid tribute to who they were as individuals, and what values they shared for their family.  As they took their vows together, they each vowed to have patience with one another in their new roles, and to support one another through the many changes they were sure to experience as they created their new home together.

It was deeply meaningful, and turned out just the way they wanted.  The kids felt so good about being included, and a new, happy family has come to be.

Cantor Debbi Ballard with Pamela and Jason

Best of luck, Pamela and Jason, and THANKS for allowing me to create your special ceremony!

B’Shalom,

Jennifer & Mickey's Interfaith wedding location at Hemingway House in Key West

Chuppah at The Hemingway House, Mickey & Jennifer's Interfaith wedding

Mickey and Jennifer are the sweetest couple, incredibly kind, loving, and so wonderful to work with!  Mickey is Jewish, and Jennifer is Chinese, and together we created a beautifully blended ceremony, including a chuppah, breaking of the glass, and ending in a beautiful Chinese Tea Ceremony, where both Mickey and Jennifer honored their parents.

Tea Cups for Chinese Tea Ceremony

Mickey and Jennifer honor Jennifer's parents in the Chinese Tea Ceremony

Mickey and Jennifer’s families were wonderful, and so much fun to celebrate with!  (Especially Mickey’s sister!)

I co-officiated the ceremony with Pastor Dave from The Hemingway House, and the setting, the food, and the whole party experience was incredible!

Best of luck to you, Mickey and Jennifer!  Wishing you all the love in the world!

B’Shalom!

Yes, I am the first Cantor to become certified in performing underwater weddings!  Using full Guardian scuba face masks, and through ProDiveUSA in Fort Lauderdale, we are going to be offering full communication, video streaming technology – underwater weddings!

I’ll post more about how this all came about, but the Sun Sentinel and South Florida live are coming out on Monday to do a story on our underwater weddings, so I wanted to get this out there right away!  We’re looking for our first couples, AND a Catholic priest to be my partner in Interfaith weddings!

Attending an Interfaith wedding can be a major source of anxiety for many wedding guests, these days. Many of us have attended weddings in our own house of worship. But when your family friend or relative tells you they are marrying a partner of a different faith that you don’t know anything about, that can cause a major case of wedding-guest jitters! What to do when you don’t know what to expect?

First and foremost – the fact that you are there, supporting your friend or family member is all that is really important to them. Today’s Interfaith couple knows that everyone is going to feel somewhat uncomfortable as a result of the unknown, but rest assured – the people feeling the most pressure are probably the bride and groom themselves. They worked hard to incorporate rituals and traditions of both of their faiths, and most likely, their main goal was to please each of their families, and not offend anyone.

Interfaith can mean a lot of things, and quite often, Interfaith also means Inter-racial, and Multi-cultural. Many religions such as the Jewish faith, Persian, Hispanic, Hindu, Muslim, and even Wiccan have rituals tied to the ceremony that provide strong symbolism in the lives of the married couple. Today’s couples are more likely to cross cultural and religious boundaries, which brings many opportunities for very interesting wedding ceremonies!

An Interfaith ceremony will most likely include language you have never heard, or rituals you don’t understand. You might be asked to sit and stand several times, or to read responsively. Most Interfaith couples will take their audience into consideration and refrain from making the ceremony “interactive”, so you can relax, and observe, and hopefully, even learn a few things from the experience.

Today’s Interfaith couples wish to incorporate the rituals of their faiths as symbols for their lives, rather than strong religious connotations. A good Officiant will often take the time to explain the symbolism that the couple has chosen to include, and to relate that ritual or symbol to the couple’s lives. A blending of traditions can be a beautiful experience, especially if one is relaxed and open minded. After all, the wedding ceremony is about the bride and groom, their love, and bringing both backgrounds together.

Today, there is so much material on the Internet about various religious and cultural wedding traditions, so it might be helpful if you are very uneasy to do a bit of research before attending the Interfaith wedding, so you can understand and even recognize the cultural symbols when you see them. Every bride and groom wants their guests to feel comfortable, so relax! Just being there for your friend or family member is the most important thing you could possibly do. Enjoy!

Please head on over – not just to see my post, but to check out all the great information Liuba provides on her blog.  It is actually written to appeal to the guests of the wedding, which is a pretty unique perspective -

So, if you like what I wrote – please drop me a note – and Liuba, as well.  Or, if you like Liuba’s site – let her know that too.  I love supporting my peers through social media!

Thanks, Liuba!  Stay tuned for “What to expect at a Jewish Wedding”…soon to follow!

In the meantime, I’m waiting for Michael to settle in from the trip, and send me his pictures, since I left my camera card in my laptop last weekend.  As soon as I get them, I will post pictures, and a review of the Sheraton Cable Beach, and then I will post about my 4 days in Aruba.

Stay dry, Florida!

“Kooky?”, I asked? “Yes, Kooky”, she replied. I wondered if this meant something “off color”, or something that would not quite go along with the fact that I am a member of the clergy, but she assured me it was completely clean, and quite adorable. You see, they have a 3 year old daughter, Destiny, and they wanted a cartoon character to perform their wedding – and they wanted their officiant to “dress up” in a costume they would provide. MMHMM, I said. And just what character would they like to have their officiant dress up as?

DORA, THE EXPLORER, her mother said.

MMHMM, I said – again. We’re talking August, on the beach in Florida, and you want me to dress up as DORA? Right. She told me they were looking for someone open minded, fun, easy going, and very much a team player. Well, that’s me. But DORA?

What the heck, I figured. You only live once, and like Wayne tells me all the time – I have to cut loose, have some fun, and take a walk on the lighter side of life. So – we agreed. They provided the costume, and I would take a hit for the team! Boy, did I ever. But – I got so much more than I bargained for. Once again, Dana and Shawn were the sweetest couple, and I fell in love with them. They had 21 guests on the beach, and dinner at the Marriott on Hollywood Beach, and there was me – in my Dora costume.

Even though this was a small, private wedding, I still felt I needed to spend the time getting to know them. So, we spoke several times by phone, before they arrived in FL, and we met the morning before the wedding. In that hour, I found out some great information that ended up providing tons of humor for their wedding ceremony. I knew I was going to need to get creative – but this really should have won an academy award!

You’ll have to read their ceremony. I really think I did a great job, if I do say so, myself. We had tons of laughs, I found a new “niche” for my wedding practice, and Dana and Shawn had the wedding of their dreams. I am definitely going to put a video of this wedding up as soon as I can figure out how, but for now – just check out the ceremony. It is sure to provide a few laughs! Dana & Shawn – I can’t tell you how much I LOVED being part of your day! More couples should be as light hearted and fun loving as you! Thanks!

The one thing about this work that never ceases to amaze me, are all the really personally rewarding experiences that come from them. Just when I think things are getting kind of routine, I get phone calls or emails from people right here in Florida, or all around the world, and somehow, I find the most amazing connections with everyone I work with.

The first story that comes to mind is that of Brett and Diane. Brett called me one day, back in February. He was kind of rambling, and kind of all over the place with what he had to say, but I could tell, there were some heavy thoughts on his mind. He was looking for someone to officiate his wedding to the woman he loved, but I could tell, he had experienced some major challenges in life, and he needed someone to listen – and to help.

He met Diane in recovery. He had been in and out of recovery his whole life, pretty much. He had a son from a previous marriage, who he was somewhat estranged from, his Mom had since passed away, and he really didn’t have any family to speak of to be with him on his wedding day. He was alone. Except for Diane – and her Mom. Diane was such a cutie. The minute I met them both in Starbucks, I was in love with them both. Brett had told me on the phone – they didn’t want anything elaborate. A simple ceremony on the beach in Delray, and off they would go, together, into the big bold world of sobriety. But, they had nothing to speak of, financially. They needed someone to stop, and listen to them, to believe in them, and preside over their vows. They wanted someone who would understand what they had each gone through to get where they were today, and most especially – someone who could give them a financial break – because again, they had relatively little to spend on their most very special day.

So, as I mentioned, we set up a meeting, and in came Brett, Diane, and Diane’s Mom. When I saw Diane, she had the most amazing smile, beautiful beaming eyes, and I fell in love with her, and Brett, and Diane’s mom – instantly. We talked about how the stars had all aligned themselves, in the most amazing ways, to bring them together, and how, miraculously, they brought each other through recovery – for most definitely (in their minds – and mine) the last time ever.

How could I have said no to this couple? They needed someone so desperately, and I was sitting there, in front of them. What they could afford was 1/5th of what I charge, typically, but it didn’t matter. I had an opportunity to make a difference in this couple’s lives, and there was no way I could walk away from them. It wasn’t an option.

So, on March 21st, I married Brett and Diane under the Jerry Garcia tie-dye style chuppa they hand made on the beach in Delray. Diane looked adorable in her hippie-style wedding dress, adorned with all of her tattoos and beaming smile. Brett couldn’t have looked any sweeter, in his casual beach wear, professing his undying love for the woman he met – just 3 months earlier, Many people would look at Brett and Diane, and swear they don’t stand a chance. I looked at them and saw a couple I just knew, would be together, until the end of time. I wish them so much luck and good fortune. I just know they will find it, too.

….More stories to come in the next post….

In the meantime, here is their wedding ceremony…Brett & Diane\’s wedding ceremony

But, almost immediately, my fears were put to rest. I naturally gravitated to Mila and Vladimir, Rita’s Aunt & Uncle. They made me feel so comfortable, and they were SO interesting to talk to. Next, Dan’s Mom and Dad came and introduced themselves to me, and again, I felt so welcomed. The group went out right after dinner, but since I was tired, I retreated to my room, intending to wake early for the next morning. Friday morning gave me an opportunity to relax, and then we met for the rehearsal of the ceremony. That was when I had the chance to meet Dan and Rita’s wedding party and immediate family, and it was beginning to feel more familiar. I was immediately taken by how friendly and attentive Rita was. She was not only breathtakingly beautiful on the outside, she is even more beautiful inside. From the first minute, she was so concerned that I was having a good time, and you could really tell it was so genuine.

Friday afternoon I had been sitting in the lobby working on some emails, and found myself sitting next to Esther, Rita’s cousin. She was so lovely and lively, and we just found ourselves talking for hours. She invited me to join her for dinner with her mom and Rita’s mother, and that was when Faina became my favorite person in the group. Faina is Esther’s mom, and she is one of the most lovely people I have ever known. She became my dinner and breakfast partner, and once we became friends, the rest of the weekend was so easy, and suddenly, I found myself falling for this group of people, because they truly were some of the most special people I have met in quite a while.

I was so taken with how all of these people came from a country that gave them nothing, monetarily. Each and every one of them had an individual story, of leaving Russia, with nothing more than a few dollars in their pockets, not even knowing where they would end up. But, one after another, they found their way to America, and boy did they overcome insurmountable odds. As I was introduced to the family members, one was a doctor, and another was a doctor, and so on. Dan’s dad fixed typewriters when he came to the U.S., and he grew that into a successful office machine business. Vladimir is a successful Engineer, and even the women put themselves through school and found jobs, and they all became successful. 90 family members who came from the most modest beginnings were celebrating, drinking LOTS of Vodka, and toasting “God Bless America” – along with a few l’chayim’s and other Russian toasts I really couldn’t master, but a great time was being had by all!

We were beginning to fear the weather, though. It rained the entire day on Friday, and by Saturday morning, it didn’t look any better. But Rita’s mom prayed extra hard to Rita’s father, who had passed away many years ago, to watch over his daughter and keep the rain away, and her prayers came true. The sun came out in the afternoon, and the wedding was amazing. Even I had a hard time keeping dry eyes through the whole ceremony. And now I can say, it was one of the best weddings I have ever done. I know I say that after every one, but this one was so special, yet I can’t really elaborate why I feel that way. Perhaps it was the people. Perhaps it was Mexico. I’m not really sure, but something very magical happened when 90 Russians converged on Mexico. It was a marriage in more than 1 way, for sure.

Sunday morning, Faina and I had our last breakfast together. We sat in the sun at the beach, and got ready to say our goodbyes. I said goodbye to Rita and Dan, Yelena (Rita’s sister), Faina, Esther, and all of my other newfound Russian friends. I will never forget this experience. It made me a richer person, and certainly not because of the financial gain. I am a better person for having met this group of people. They made me remember that my problems are insignificant, compared to the challenges they have met in life. They reminded me that even though people are different, we can still put aside our differences, and find ways of communicating in loving ways, across cultures. They reminded me it is fun to learn about and meet people from other cultures, that there is a whole big world out there, aside from my own.

They opened the world up to me, and I’m so happy to have met Russia in Mexico. Dan and Rita – I wish you the best life has to offer, because you deserve it. You are an amazingly beautiful couple, and I thank you for everything you brought to my life. Make sure you let me know when the first baby is coming!