For Kathy – and her Mom, a Church wedding was their #1 must have.  For Drew, and his Mom, the rich, beautiful Jewish traditions that kept them connected to their Jewish heritage were theirs.  We needed a church, a chuppah, a unity candle, a kiddush cup, a ketubah, and many more aspects of each of our faiths to incorporate into their wedding ceremony.

So many of Kathy’s plans kept falling through, between scheduling of the Air and Sea Show, and Churches and Pastors not being available, that Kathy and Drew even contemplated making the whole thing a destination wedding!  But – Kathy persevered, because she really wanted the wedding of her dreams – and I think they got just that!

The first time I met Kathy and Drew, and their Moms, Merideth and Susan, we had a love fest, a session filled with “absolutely’s” and “of course’s”!  In the next meeting, at the church, with Kathy and Drew, Susan, Dr. DeBie, and myself, things got a tiny bit tense, as we worked diligently to find just the right mix and blend of each of our “must haves”.  Several months later, we drew up the final ceremony program, and it seemed, we had ourselves the perfect Interfaith wedding.

Last night, Kathy and Drew were married at the Church By the Sea, with Dr. Linden DeBie, and myself co-officiating. First, to walk into that church, and see the beautiful chuppah standing there waiting for us, was so profound.  It meant so much to me, to know that we worked so hard to create a service that was full of faith, and that even though we both thought very differently about our faiths, we were able to put our differences aside, for the beauty of what unites us.

Chuppah in the church

As the processional began, Susan and Merideth arrived at the altar, lit the side candles of the Unity Candle, and were seated.  As Kathy arrived at the altar with her Dad, I welcomed everyone, and Dr. DeBie offered the Declaration of Intent, and asked the Giving of the Bride.  Kathy and Drew then stepped together under the chuppah, and Dr. DeBie performed their vows, and then I performed the traditional Jewish ring exchange.  Kathy and Drew lit their center Unity Candle, as their guitarist played “Here Comes the Sun”.  (beautiful)

The rest of the ceremony was – believe it or not – predominantly Jewish-style.  We signed their ketubah, shared the wine from their 6th generation kiddush cup from Drew’s family, and I sang the Birkat Kohanim (Julie Silver’s version).

Afterwards, Dr. DeBie pronounced Kathy and Drew husband and wife, and I concluded the ceremony with the breaking of the glass.

Looking back, and hearing everyone’s comments, I know fully why I do what I do.  I may not be able to change the world, or the face of faith, but I can certainly change some family’s lives, by giving them hope to see that love transcends individual beliefs.  That together, when we can sit a table and focus on what unites us, rather than what divides us, that all things are possible.

Today, I look back on Kathy and Drew’s wedding last night, with love, fond memories, and even stronger hope for the future, of a world that looks peaceful, and stands in unity.

Amen.

When I think about my most unique weddings, I immediately think about the unique relationships I have formed, not only with my couples, but with their friends and family as well, because to ME – that is what makes MY weddings most unique!  For instance, when I’m asked that question, I am always taken back to Dan & Rita’s in Mexico, Felix & Evelina’s in Aruba, Jenni & Mike’s in Fort Lauderdale (diverted from Mexico compliments of Swine Flu), and now, Cheryl and Prav.  Unique to me, are couples and family who are now as close to me as my own family, and whose experiences made a lasting impression on me – for years to come.

And now, I can add Cheryl and Prav to that list.  From the moment I spoke to  Cheryl, we were in love!  She and Prav live in Raleigh, NC, but her mom lives in Boca, and so we made plans to meet on her next trip to South Florida.  Cheryl, Prav, her mom Joselyn, and Step-Dad Ted all met at Cheesecake Factory for dinner, and had the best time.  It was important to Cheryl that I knew her and Prav – I mean – really knew her, and Cheryl LOVES to share, so getting to know them as individuals and as a couple was very easy.  Cheryl and Prav have hearts the size of Manhattan.  They would do anything, give anything, be anything, to and for anyone they loved, because that is just who they are.

And boy oh boy – do they love each other.  Yeah, I know – every couple on their wedding day really loves each other, but seriously, this couple is different.  The love they share for one another brings each of them to tears – at least 3 times a day.  I seriously think Prav prays three times a day, and each time, his #1 prayer is one of gratitude for Cheryl – and vice versa.  I’ve never seen a couple so incredibly grateful for each other, and that’s part of what make Cheryl and Prav so unique.

So, on December 21, at Coconut Cove in Islamorada, with the most beautiful ocean behind me, and the most beautiful couple in front of me, I joined Cheryl and Prav in marriage, in a night I will likely never forget.  The venue, I just have to say, was one of the best places I have ever performed a wedding at.  First and foremost, it is a beautiful piece of real estate, but Paul and Magda run the operation, and they run it like it was their own wedding.

The food is amazing, but it was also the layout I loved most.  Guests could dance, but the dining area was separated from the dance floor, so we could enjoy each other’s company, if we chose not to dance.  And the fact that it was a private location – without 10 other weddings going on at the same time made it feel so personal, and warm, that it was incredibly enjoyable!  BUT – the most amazing part?  How about taking your first dance on the packed-sand beach, with fireworks being set off behind you?  Priceless, incredibly priceless.

The most priceless part, overall, however, is my Cheryl and Prav.  I love how they love each other.  They inspire me.  They encourage me.  They have become incredibly meaningful in my life, and I can’t imagine life without them.  Now, that’s unique.

Love you, Cheryl & Prav!

Jennifer & Mickey's Interfaith wedding location at Hemingway House in Key West

Chuppah at The Hemingway House, Mickey & Jennifer's Interfaith wedding

Mickey and Jennifer are the sweetest couple, incredibly kind, loving, and so wonderful to work with!  Mickey is Jewish, and Jennifer is Chinese, and together we created a beautifully blended ceremony, including a chuppah, breaking of the glass, and ending in a beautiful Chinese Tea Ceremony, where both Mickey and Jennifer honored their parents.

Tea Cups for Chinese Tea Ceremony

Mickey and Jennifer honor Jennifer's parents in the Chinese Tea Ceremony

Mickey and Jennifer’s families were wonderful, and so much fun to celebrate with!  (Especially Mickey’s sister!)

I co-officiated the ceremony with Pastor Dave from The Hemingway House, and the setting, the food, and the whole party experience was incredible!

Best of luck to you, Mickey and Jennifer!  Wishing you all the love in the world!

B’Shalom!

Greg and Serin were married last weekend, on Clearwater Beach, FL.  A beautiful west coast sunset, and beautiful cool weather were on hand for a magnificent wedding ceremony and family gathering.  I really enjoyed working with The Hilton hotel, and Joanie, the Wedding coordinator was amazingly helpful!  The coming together of Greg and Serin’s families were so interesting, as Greg’s heritage is of Moroccan descent, Sephardic Jews, and Serin’s family is Presbyterian, but they do such an amazing job blending their lives, and their relationship is so pure, that the differences between them are simple reminders of what they appreciate in each other.

Greg’s father recited the Sheva Brachot (Seven Blessings) in Hebrew, while I read the English Humanistic version of the blessings.  As the sun was setting, and I was singing the Priestly Blessing, and I saw the joy in Greg and Serin’s face, I was once again reminded that G0d was certainly present at their wedding, and would be with them through every step of their married lives together.

Best of luck, Greg & Serin!

B’Shalom

First stop:  Greenville, NC, where I had the pleasure and privilege of officiating the wedding for Leigh & Matthew.  Leigh is Meridith’s sister, whose wedding I performed back in December of ‘07.  The family has become very special to me over the last couple of years, so it was really  even more of an honor for me to do Leigh’s wedding.  Shortly after Meridith hired me for her wedding, they found out her Mom had brain cancer, and she was going in for immediate surgery.  Joann recovered from surgery, and happily was able to celebrate her daughter’s wedding, and I admired her so much for her incredible strength.  She was a beautiful woman, and I was so happy she could celebrate that joyous time.

A year ago, Elliot emailed me to let me know that his 2nd daughter, Leigh, was getting married, and asked me if I could also co-officiate with Matthew’s childhood Minister, Lisa.  I was thrilled, and together, Lisa and I created a perfect ceremony – a blend of both Leigh & Matt’s backgrounds and faiths.

But sadly, by November, Joann had passed away.  Elliot assured me that Joann had been able to help Leigh make all of her plans, and though she wouldn’t be able to celebrate Leigh’s most special day, she did everything she could to make sure it had just the right touches, and that – it did.

Leigh made a beautiful bride, and Meridith was a magnificent matron of honor.  Matthew is the most adorable young man, who also works for Elliot, and adores Leigh with all of his heart and soul.  It was sad to be without Joann, but I couldn’t be happier that the family is doing well, and enjoying all of the simchas that life brings.  Meridith and Kevin are proud parents to baby Rose, and Leigh and Matt are starting their lives together, and hopefully, they will also soon be blessed with children.

I feel so honored to be such a special part of this family, and I hope we continue to remain special to each other.  Leigh & Matt, I wish you all the blessings life holds, and may your lives together be blessed with joy, health, and abundance.

B’Shalom

So, things were off to a great start from the minute I heard from Dana, because she emailed me and told me that her fiance, Seth, was the son of a business associate/friend of mine, and they wanted to talk about me doing their wedding.  Seth’s Mom – Ellen, is the only other Whirling Dirvish I have ever met, other than Lara Mayer, from Max’s Bar Mitzvah.  I’m not quite sure what a whirling dirvish is, but I know that Ellen’s picture is under it, in the Webster’s Dictionary.  Truly.

Seth isn’t much different from his Mom.  He is SUCH a character.  And Dana is the perfect match for him.  From the first moment we met, we all shared a great connection, and I just couldn’t help but fall in love with this perfect combination of wit, humor, and sarcasm, and that made getting to know them SO much of an adventure.  I knew, when we met for the last time at Starbucks, that I was really going to miss my Thursday evening coffee sessions, because I always felt myself smiling for hours after leaving one of our meetings.  They are just so damned cute.  SO CUTE.  Together.  A perfect match, a match made in heaven, yes…beshert…..

Dana and Seth are so close, they almost share the same DNA.  I don’t think I ever witnessed an awkward moment, or a single answer that was any different from what the other answered.  They should totally be on the Newlywed Game – if it was still around.

But, the best part of Dana and Seth, was their wedding ceremony.  From the minute I got to Woodfield Country Club, you could feel the love and excitement in the air.  The florists were putting together the chuppa and the walkway, and I knew from that first look that this was going to be an exquisite setting, and it was.

We held the Ketubah signing prior to the ceremony, and their ketubah was so beautiful.  It was a special moment for their immediate family, and for Dana and Seth, as well.  Within a few minutes, we were off to line up for the processional!

Perhaps my ultimate favorite part of the ceremony was the processional.  Dana and Seth picked the BEST music for their processional, and I began walking out to Jack Johnson’s “Better Together”.  A very popular pick these days, it’s also the most played song on my IPOD, so I was really psyched to be walking to my favorite song in the whole world.  Then, she chose a song by Van Morrison (I think it was Into the Mystic….will have to verify that) but it was such a pretty song.  Then, my ultimate favorite song played for her processional (which has now taken over JJ’s Better Together as #1 Ipod song) by Marc Cohn, called “True Companion”.  OMG.  What an amazing song.  I was beaming at her walking down the aisle, because the mood was just so happy, and exuberant, and I was so excited to be waiting for both Seth and Dana at the chuppa!

The wedding ceremony was beautiful – Dana wasn’t sure if she wanted to circle Seth for the Seven Blessings or not, and at the last minute, she chose to have me wrap the Tallit around them, but it was just as beautiful.

They exchanged their rings in the Jewish traditional way, first on the right index finger, and then moving them over to their own left ring fingers.  I concluded the ceremony with the Birkat Cohanim, Julie Silver’s version, and on to the breaking of the glass and the pronouncement. They were married.  And beaming at each other.  And I was sad – that it was over.

Dana and Seth – I just think you two are so much fun, and I can’t believe time flew by us so quickly.  I’m happy you live right around the corner, because I really hope you’ll still make time for some coffee-Thursdays.  In the meantime, have a great time on that incredible honeymoon you are going on and thanks for the awesome memories.  Love u both!

Attending an Interfaith wedding can be a major source of anxiety for many wedding guests, these days. Many of us have attended weddings in our own house of worship. But when your family friend or relative tells you they are marrying a partner of a different faith that you don’t know anything about, that can cause a major case of wedding-guest jitters! What to do when you don’t know what to expect?

First and foremost – the fact that you are there, supporting your friend or family member is all that is really important to them. Today’s Interfaith couple knows that everyone is going to feel somewhat uncomfortable as a result of the unknown, but rest assured – the people feeling the most pressure are probably the bride and groom themselves. They worked hard to incorporate rituals and traditions of both of their faiths, and most likely, their main goal was to please each of their families, and not offend anyone.

Interfaith can mean a lot of things, and quite often, Interfaith also means Inter-racial, and Multi-cultural. Many religions such as the Jewish faith, Persian, Hispanic, Hindu, Muslim, and even Wiccan have rituals tied to the ceremony that provide strong symbolism in the lives of the married couple. Today’s couples are more likely to cross cultural and religious boundaries, which brings many opportunities for very interesting wedding ceremonies!

An Interfaith ceremony will most likely include language you have never heard, or rituals you don’t understand. You might be asked to sit and stand several times, or to read responsively. Most Interfaith couples will take their audience into consideration and refrain from making the ceremony “interactive”, so you can relax, and observe, and hopefully, even learn a few things from the experience.

Today’s Interfaith couples wish to incorporate the rituals of their faiths as symbols for their lives, rather than strong religious connotations. A good Officiant will often take the time to explain the symbolism that the couple has chosen to include, and to relate that ritual or symbol to the couple’s lives. A blending of traditions can be a beautiful experience, especially if one is relaxed and open minded. After all, the wedding ceremony is about the bride and groom, their love, and bringing both backgrounds together.

Today, there is so much material on the Internet about various religious and cultural wedding traditions, so it might be helpful if you are very uneasy to do a bit of research before attending the Interfaith wedding, so you can understand and even recognize the cultural symbols when you see them. Every bride and groom wants their guests to feel comfortable, so relax! Just being there for your friend or family member is the most important thing you could possibly do. Enjoy!

When I came back from the Puerto Rico wedding, I quickly got ready for Leah’s Bat Mitzvah.  I have a friend who tutors children, and they were looking for someone to officiate the ceremony, so we worked as a team together.  It was really enjoyable, and the family was so much fun to work with.  The Bat Mitzvah was held on a Saturday evening, so we held a Havdalah service, which seems to be super popular these days.  It happens to be my favorite service, because I love including the contemporary Havdalah music and including everyone in the song and ceremony.  What great fun!  Leah did a great job, as did her sister, who also chanted from the Torah.  It was a beautiful night!

Just before the Bat Mitzvah, I spent a few personal days in Orlando as well, and saw my newest favorite musician, Matt Shenk.  He’s so awesome, and his music is at the top of my “most played” list in Itunes.  He is a master guitar player, has an awesome voice, and his words are so relatable!  Check him out at www.mattshenk.com.

Last week, I had the pleasure of officiating the wedding of Micha and Sam.  I don’t have pics yet, so I am saving the blog story, but they were so adorable, I just had to mention them here.  One of the youngest couples I have married, they are also one of the most mature.  I can’t wait for them to get back from their honeymoon, so I can hear how their first week of marriage went!

This weekend, I am performing the wedding for Annie & Greg. Annie is working incredibly hard at pulling off her wedding on a tight budget, and I think she has done an amazing job.  I can’t wait to see the result of her efforts.

I am also performing a Baby Naming for Mason and Emily, Sage and Jonah.  This is the couple I wrote about last week, titled, A Baby Naming, For all the right reasons…I can’t wait for this beautiful event, and to meet these two lucky little boys.

Trevor is home, and in between, I’m going to try to spend as much time as possible with him.  It’s a busy month, and I am so blessed to be so busy!  And I count those blessings, every day…

B’Shalom,

I know I say this all of the time, but I am just so fortunate in that every one of my wedding couples is amazing – but truly, Eden and Eduardo were such an amazing couple in so many ways.  It was such a great experience getting to know them, and to be such a special part of their most special day.

Eden & Ed live in Washington, DC, and they were referred to me by Rabbi Lev at www.interfaithfamily.com.  As soon as Eden contacted me, we both knew right away we were going to be the most perfect match, and we definitely had that assumption right on all counts!  Eden has one of those personalities that just comes right through the phone and you imagine that girl in junior high school who was just bursting with enthusiasm sitting next to you with a GREAT BIG SMILE on her face, and energy that would last for days.

Well – that’s EXACTLY what you got with Eden!  As I was writing notes about the feelings I had about her and Eduardo as we had our conversations on the phone, I kept thinking “earthy, warm, syrup-y, and sweet”.  Again – I totally had it right!

Getting to the wedding venue wasn’t quite as easy as forming the initial connection, but it was a fun and coversation-sparking adventure nonetheless.  They were married at The Villa Montana, in a small town, in the north-western part of the island, called Isabela.  It was about a 2 hour car ride from the San Juan airport.  Well, I was supposed to depart Fort Lauderdale at 6am (ick), but I just happened to check on my flight the night before, and found out that flight no longer existed.  I was sooooo upset, because they were having the rehearsal dinner that evening and wanted me there.  The flight I was booked on now left at 11am, arriving in SJU at 3.  That should have put me there for the rehearsal around 5:30.  Right.

As I made my way off the plane, I went to the pickup area, expecting to be met by a driver, but nobody was waiting for me.  (what a lonely feeling!!)  I called the hotel, and she began checking, and came back and told me the driver was there – but his van had just been TOWED AWAY, and he was trying to get it back.  After about an hour or more, he finally arrived to pick me up – and we were on our way – in Friday night rush hour traffic.  UGH.

At 6:30, I finally arrived at the beautiful little Villa Montana in Isabela.  Paradise.

This place had the small, intimate feel of a guest house, but was loaded with amenities and beauty.  I was immediately greeted by many of her family members as I was rushed to the rehearsal dinner on the beach, and there was Eden, and I just fell in love with her – as I knew I would.

That night, I got to know many of her guests, and met her family, as well as Eduardo’s.  Ed’s family is from Puerto Rico, and were the most wonderful, gracious, and appreciative family I have met in a long time.  I just knew the wedding would be amazing.

The next morning, I was able to spend quite a bit of time with Eden and Ed’s family and friends over breakfast on the beach.  We spoke for hours about Eden and Eduardo, their personalities, experiences, and their lives.  They told me incredible stories that really helped paint a perfect picture of my newest favorite couple, and I was able to create a perfectly blended, earthy, universalist-style ceremony that was a perfect match for their personalities.  We even re-wrote the words to The 7 Blessings, taking the religious language down a notch, and focusing on the meaning and appreciation of life.  It was quite beautiful.

Watching Eden and Ed before me, as I performed their marriage, was the perfect culimination of the experience.  Standing before me was not only a couple in love, but 2 best friends, laughing, touching, giggling, beaming, and kvelling together.  Knowing their closest friends and family were behind them, being witnesses to this magical moment, you could see the joy in their faces, and their hearts, as they spoke their vows to each other.

Certainly, the dinner party on the beach was also quite fun, and I had the most wonderful time with their friends and family.  To everyone I met at the wedding – thank you for making me feel SO comfortable, and welcomed, and thank you for helping me create another beautiful wedding.  Bob & Carol – thanks for the ride the next day to the airport, you are a wonderful couple!  Paula & Ira – thank you SO much for your hospitality – and Eden & Ed – Mazel Tov and Buena Suerte.  You are a beautiful couple that I will remember forever.  See you in DC in May!

B’Shalom,